Rough Diamonds

I write a bunch of stuff – sometimes the content is useful, sometimes not so much.

In order to process my spiritual and psychological insights I like to create some sort of poetry from time to time. Sometimes it’s just a few words, sometimes it’s a letter and sometimes it’s a whole story.

‘Rough Diamonds’ describes the current state of these snippets of text.

by Uli on Rough Diamonds

Autumn Leaves and Jelly Fishes

“It’s autumn. A good time to #reflect. A good time to not ‘be busy getting somewhere’.

A time to look at what this year had taught you. And to contemplate what’s worth carrying with you and what to better leave behind.

It’s the time to drop some weight.

Take a moment to just enjoy the spectacle, watch the colourful sky, embrace the early sunset and the leaves on the ground.

Allow #lightness inbetween your branches, your thoughts, your ideas, your feelings, within your heart…
Allow yourself to be on the ground together with the leaves.
Allow yourself to merge with the seasons.
Allow yourself to #recharge before a new phase arises.
Allow yourself to rest within every step, every move you make.
Allow yourself to be. Be present and listen to the wind….”

Autumn 2019

All year around the seasons are an inspiration for me.

Last November on a weekend trip to Budweis I contemplated on the falling leaves ‘merging with the ground’.

And so did I. I merged with the ground.

Yesterday morning in the park I had a moment of lightness. Where was it coming from? This rush of energy?

It was a freezing cold morning. I was walking with a warm coffee in one hand and my boyfriend in the other. The cold breeze on this late November morning refreshed my face.

I looked up to the sky where I could see some golden leaves dancing with the wind in front of my favorite church tower – in the part of Munich I currently live in.

(As most of you know by now I am a nomad from the heart and so far nothing could possibly stop me.)

I looked around.

“There is so much space.,” I said out loud. My boyfriend agreed without knowing specifically what I was talking about.

I was walking this path dozens of times in the last weeks on the way to the park.

But only now I could see this grassland next to the little pathway. It is kind of a meadow – just behind huge oak and beech trees.

I took the deepest possible breath through my mouth right down into my stomach.

Naturally my entire abdominal wall expanded and relaxed.

I felt ease.

I looked directly into the sun. She was blinding me tenderly.

I felt a huge sense of clarity.

Only a couple of days earlier I asked myself how I would possibly manage this dark season in Germany? The last years I had spent partly in Italy or India during the winter.

The last weeks I admired the colourful leaves – but kind of a sadness had been arising. A kind of grief.

But today I remembered…

Autumn is a time of immense transformation.

Autumn is a time of release.
Old energies are being released…

The trees drop their leaves and they make space for new shoots.

The harvest for this year is over.
Everything that doesn’t belong here anymore is being recycled.
The ground for the new is being tilled.
The restoration takes place in silence.

There is this enegy of renewal in every season.

We better roll with it and rest, restore and recover.

What does this have to do with jelly fishes?

Well, this post was intended to be about jelly fishes, but I didn’t quite ‘get there’…

So, I guess that’s material for a different story.

But did you know that some jelly fishes are immortal? 😀

 
by Uli on Rough Diamonds, Writing Experiment

Compassion is Nothing to Achieve

Compassion is something you grow naturally.

How do you grow it?

By crossing your boundaries – once in a while and realizing that it doesn’t necessarily do you any harm.

By experiencing life outside of your comfort zone you become more sensitive to other people’s comfort zone.

Time after time you will realize that your precious standards are based on a value system that is printed in your genes.

All of a sudden you will see clearly that the life you have built is a reflection of your conditioning. (Yes, I am repeating myself, because you don’t get it. )

Compassion is nothing you earn. Compassion is not a skill. Compassion is also not your virtue. (Well…. Is it? I will think about it.)

Compassion arises in the moment when you give away your power. Compassion is what arises when you can see through this conditioning.

All of a sudden you will be able to look somebody in the eyes and SEE them and treat them like a human being – no matter if they live on the street, no matter if they are black or white, drunk or sober, if they are rich or poor, a sinner or a saint, if they wear a mask or not……..

It is when you stop taking yourself so fucking serious….

When you stop expecting that the world is appearing and behaving accordingly to your anticipation.

Your ego will just drop and you will feel the other.

What we have here is a golden cage and we are desperately searching for that door to get out…

What we don’t understand is that we just have to sit still and let the dust settle.

The door is right there. We just can’t see it because we are stirred up by threat and propaganda.

What does this have to do with compassion?

Everything.

Because as soon as we don’t take our own selves so fucking serious anymore we will realize how ridiculous the restrictions are that we impose on ourselves…

The walls we are building are getting higher and higher.

The paranoia is getting more threatening and threatening because we don’t see what is behind the wall?

We are trying to find a national solution for a global problem…

What we truely need is a connection with our human needs. And these needs don’t have a passport. They don’t have a legal basis. They don’t have regional boarders.

They are just based on compassion for oneself, for our bodies and our minds – for us and for our neighbours…

Amen.

 
by Uli on Rough Diamonds, Transformation Inventory

Soul Retrieval

Hi Soul,
welcome back. Take some space. Make yourself comfortable. This body is your home. I’m sorry for neglecting you for that long. I was busy doing life. I appreciate your perseverance. From now on I’m coming back to existing – in close communion with you.

Sincerely yours,
Mind

 
by Uli on Rough Diamonds

What is Freedom?

When are you truly free?

You don’t let the circumstances define you.
You let go of concepts.
You give space – and not advice.
You know what you are doing.
Your fear gave way to your excitement.
You feel joy.
You care for yourself the same way you care for others.
You are at home within yourself.
You don’t have to proof yourself.
You know your boundaries. That’s why you are not afraid of crossing them.
You do one step at a time.
You let go of the outcome. But you never loose focus.

You smile from the inside.
You don’t reach through the matrix – you roll with it.
You accept where you are at.
You have learnt to differentiate.
You express yourself.
You let others express themselves how they please without interfering.

You love like there is no tomorrow.

Your fears had lost their power over you.
The demands of this world don’t overwhelm you anymore.
You are not that easily pushed from your throne.

You have exchanged your phantasies with ideas.

You are not being easily impressed, but you are awe-inspired by life itself…

 
by Uli on Rough Diamonds, Transformation Inventory

About Words

Why I write?

My words are my light. My words are my darkness. My words are my journey. My words are my destination. My words are my home.

They are nothing I ‘make up’.

I don’t do words.

Writing is not my skill, it is my trait.

My words are the process. They are my tools and my material at the same time.

Words set the stage and they perform. They are able to build and to dissolve. Words are the story and the narrator – all at once.

My words are like stray dogs. I let them run free and this is how they thrive. I don’t restrict them. I treat them with care. They have a place in my heart and this is why they always come back to me.

If I put them on a leash they get cranky. If I overindulge them they spoil.

Words – I use them as they use me. I become them. I am transcending through my words as they transcend through me.

My words are my thoughts but they are also my brain.

My words are my ascension partners. My words are my closest friends or my worst enemies. It depends. (And no, this is not a matter of perspective and this is okay….)

I can’t say ‘I want my trust back!’ I can’t say ‘I have to trust’. I can ‘just’ trust.

If I allow my words to be, they unfold. This is writing. It is a subconscious outlet of my expansion. They are nothing but a valve – but just as crucial as a pipeline for delivering drinking water.

What are they delivering? Words are the messenger but also the freight.

Words are zen. Words are the tao.

Words are everything if you let them. Words are nothing if you take them too seriously.

Take them too accurate and they will become your prison.

Let them go wild and they will become your shelter.

The other day there was high water at Isar after three days of heavy rain.

There is a swimming spot I had been visiting regularly during this summer season. It was kind of an island amidst my favourite river here in Munich.

The flood water rearranged the whole river bed. All the algea were washed away.

No stone was left unturned.

The currents had changed. A wooden stamp had built a little whirl pool in the very center of the river bed.

Everything was renewed and refreshed. It felt like a restart.

And this is what words do if you let them flow. They rearrange themselves. They become more powerful. They clear themselves. They settle.

This is the really f***ing difficult part of writing. Your mind wants to control. It wants to know the end of the sentence before you even start typing.

It wants to outline the whole book instead of creating the first chapter.

True beauty, the real raw beauty lies in imperfection.

Did you ever consider a tree as imperfect? Did you ever think ‘This tree really looks like shit here.’?

If yes, I’m sorry. I’m praying for you.

Your soul understands.

A tree is a tree.

It grows out of the elements.

It is the elements. It is creation. It arises out of destruction. It sprouts from the mud.

And so does your creation.

Creation demands freedom.

So, don’t do it perfectly.

Just do it.

Do it with your heart. Do it with trust. Lean into it fully.

Own it – and then let it go.

Give it away. If you cling to it, it will restrict you.

This is how you become a slave to your perfectionism.

But you know what?

Don’t beat yourself up for your poisonous perfectionism. It will make it worse.

Move to your rhythm. But move.

Don’t stay still. Don’t be paralyzed in the face of your perfectionism.

Smile at it. Be perfect in the now, but don’t try to live up to it.

This is how you integrate it. Accept and take action.

Instead of making a perfect plan, do the next step.

Put your faith into action. Don’t make ‘being perfect’ your goal, but make it your approach.

This all sounds paradoxical.

Let it be what it is and jump right in.

My words are exploring darkness.
My words are cutting and piercing through – until the truth leaks out.
This is how I enter the light.